A sad situation for my Berlingo and more...

[Primal Van Man]

Here's the situation: my wife wants a divorce. My father gave me 18.5k to buy a new Berlingo, my wife used 5k from her card for the rest of the total price of 23.5k. A bad event happened 12 days ago, in which I was attacked while holding my daughter, yet was blamed for the whole situation. Needless to say, I can't keep the car. The car was registered in my name,but hasn't left the dealership. I am bot eligible for a refund because of this. They offered me 20k for it now, or they offered to advertise it for me on their website, and they think they can get 21k. However, this can take a few months. I think I should give my father 18.5k in return, but that only leaves 1.5k for the wife (soon to be ex-wife.) What do you guys recommend I do? Thanks.

[Mark604]

If you are getting divorced then other assets may come into play, but taking this in isolation I'd take the 20 thousand for a quick end to it - then work out what percentage your father and wife put into the initial cost, then use that to work out what they'd get back from the 20 grand.
Then either make the difference up to your dad as soon as possible or with some other arrangement over time to pay the balance back.
Don't promise anything to your wife and get the obvious legal help to sort out the assets in total.

[Sol]

Your wife can't force a divorce without acceptable legal grounds. If you did nothing wrong, then that's the situation. You end up in an agreed mutual separation with no financial change other than you pay maintenance / child support to her from your income.

Then after 2 years in most EU countries I believe (UK definitely), you can apply for a divorce under the mutual separation rules. At that point, assets are divided up and allocated to both parties.

Until then, what is yours is still yours. I would take the 20k, do as said above to keep the peace, and try to resolve the difference from your earnings. If you have no job, then you have a problem I guess. Would I be wrong in assuming you are an American citizen but are married to an Eastern European wife?

[Guanock]

Don't you just love this forum. Free marriage guidance counselling .

Geoff

[Gryffindor]

I will limit my advice to just the car finance, for one very good reason.

Take the £20k - it is a lot better than you might have been offered or might get otherwise, but more importantly it is (or promises to be) problem-free and hassle-free.

All your other issues at the moment are piling up on you big time, and although money seems to be the biggest issue of all, it really isn't - the health and well-being of you and your family (especially daughter and father) are the most important factors and always will be.

So do yourself a very big favour and avoid a big headache worrying over the car's finance by taking this offer now, and thank the dealer.

One thing you could try - ask them if they would include in the deal a discount against a future purchase by you - for example, a £1000 discount if claimed within 2 years on a car priced at £10 or above. Details negotiable of course - and don't be too picky - anything they offer is better than no offer.

Maye you could even use this idea to your future advantage - say your wife tries to claim some of the proceeds from the 20k in the future. But if you make an offer to the dealer of 18k cash instead of 20k, plus a voucher for 4k off a future purchase, that's less actual figures on the balance sheet - the voucher can stay private, or it could be put in your father's name.

[Gryffindor]

Don't you just love this forum. Free marriage guidance counselling .

Geoff

I am sure my Berlingo wants to divorce me. Even after all that bubbly I keep pouring into her tubes...

Welded bliss!

[Primal Van Man]

If you are getting divorced then other assets may come into play, but taking this in isolation I'd take the 20 thousand for a quick end to it - then work out what percentage your father and wife put into the initial cost, then use that to work out what they'd get back from the 20 grand.
Then either make the difference up to your dad as soon as possible or with some other arrangement over time to pay the balance back.
Don't promise anything to your wife and get the obvious legal help to sort out the assets in total.

[Primal Van Man]

Your wife can't force a divorce without acceptable legal grounds. If you did nothing wrong, then that's the situation. You end up in an agreed mutual separation with no financial change other than you pay maintenance / child support to her from your income.

Then after 2 years in most EU countries I believe (UK definitely), you can apply for a divorce under the mutual separation rules. At that point, assets are divided up and allocated to both parties.

Until then, what is yours is still yours. I would take the 20k, do as said above to keep the peace, and try to resolve the difference from your earnings. If you have no job, then you have a problem I guess. Would I be wrong in assuming you are an American citizen but are married to an Eastern European wife?

[Primal Van Man]

Don't you just love this forum. Free marriage guidance counselling .

Geoff

[Primal Van Man]

I will limit my advice to just the car finance, for one very good reason.

Take the £20k - it is a lot better than you might have been offered or might get otherwise, but more importantly it is (or promises to be) problem-free and hassle-free.

All your other issues at the moment are piling up on you big time, and although money seems to be the biggest issue of all, it really isn't - the health and well-being of you and your family (especially daughter and father) are the most important factors and always will be.

So do yourself a very big favour and avoid a big headache worrying over the car's finance by taking this offer now, and thank the dealer.

One thing you could try - ask them if they would include in the deal a discount against a future purchase by you - for example, a £1000 discount if claimed within 2 years on a car priced at £10 or above. Details negotiable of course - and don't be too picky - anything they offer is better than no offer.

Maye you could even use this idea to your future advantage - say your wife tries to claim some of the proceeds from the 20k in the future. But if you make an offer to the dealer of 18k cash instead of 20k, plus a voucher for 4k off a future purchase, that's less actual figures on the balance sheet - the voucher can stay private, or it could be put in your father's name.